Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Long Time Gone

It has been over a year since my last post.  Wow.  Things have really changed!!  I post here as much for myself as I do for an audience (good thing, because I think there are just two of you!).  This is a bit like a diary.  I can look back and see where I was, and where I am now.  So here is what happened.

Jacob moved out early in 2012.  That was rough.  It took us about 6 to 8 months to get him to come back home.  I think it was just too soon for him.  The details of his time away I will leave out.  Those are his story, I am just a character in that drama. He is still home now, but making noises about moving out.  I sure hope he will wait another year or more so that he can save some money and leave when he is better positioned to succeed.  However, I know by now, that he will do, what he will do.  I will be his cheerleader, counselor and I hope a trusted advisor.  But maybe not his banker.  That is not my strong suit.

Forward to early fall.  Kim lost his job at... no, never mind, I won't name names.  He lost his job, to be specific, he got fired.  That was hard.  He worked mainly for benefits, gasoline and grocery money.  All three of those were and are very critical!  Kim is diabetic, so benefits were something I set to work looking into right away.  We had three options in my mind.

1.  Purchase COBRA coverage.  That was a beastly number to consider in my newly shrunken budget!  It was really not an option at all, even if we only covered Kim.

2.  My boss offered to add us to the company plan with several options.  He was very generous and also offered to pay for the majority (if not all---I cant remember now) of my portion of the bill.  This was also a nasty wake-up for me.  To find a plan remotely similar to the coverage we were losing at my husbands job, it would cost us out of pocket over $1,000 per month.  That was no option at all.  There were more affordable options, of course. but the coverage was much lower.  We would have paid around $500 and still had a large deductible to meet, and also would have had to pay for the majority of his medications. 

3.  Sadly, the option I was most seriously considering was no coverage at all.  I had decided that we could pay for his services and meds for about what the cost of the insurance would be.  The dangerousness of this was not lost on me.  I do sell insurance!  I knew that a catastrophe would ruin us. 

I was really struggling and praying about what to do.  Trying not to worry about the future.  But sort of consumed by it anyway.        

Then out of the blue a job opportunity dropped into my lap.  A friend (insert AWESOME!) contacted me about a position where she worked.  It would include benefits at an affordable cost, and a modest raise.  Benefits not only for Kim and I, but for Jacob, too!  All for less than the option I had looked at with my company.  Good benefits, too.  Comparable to what we had lost!  I tried to say no.  I argued with myself.  How could any company offer me what I had worked 20 years to have?  It would be different.  I knew that.  The fear I felt was like a MONSTER chasing me.  But every objection I tossed out, was batted back down.  It seemed like the right job at the right time.

So here I am!  5 months later.  Learning new things, messing things up, crying a little now and then (especially at first!), but I think I am doing well.  The first month was brutal.  We had some family health issues and I was trying to learn new things.  It seems like a bad dream, now.

Most recently, and most sadly, we lost my beloved Grandma.  She was 91 years old.  She had a stroke and lingered a few months.  My heart just yearns for her company.  Puzzles, cookies, long talks, or just the peace that I always found in her presence.  She was HOME to me.  But I am getting used to it.  It was past her time to go.  I am sure she stayed so long just to keep taking care of the family.  RIP, Grams.  Thank you for being my peaceful, safe haven.  Love you forever!       
This was a long post about something many of you don't care anything about.  But, now that we are up to date, maybe I will check back more often and share some happiness.

1 comment:

Debbie said...

We both seem to have problems with change. I can't imagine changing jobs and starting over. To give up the comfortable spot where you know your place....
I am so proud of you. You had the courage to do it.
You always have a kind word for anyone that seems to need it. I wish I could find the words to help ease the pain of her being gone. While the whole world spun madly around us she was always there. Cheering for us, scolding us, feeding us, teaching us about so many things. I miss her.