I mentioned in my post a few days ago that I have been thinking of my foster mom, Bobby, a lot lately. Her 73rd birthday would have been last week. She died in early September of this year after battling with cancer three different times. She was such a special person. She loved the people in her life very much and I was so blessed to be chosen as one of those people. Everyone who knew her would agree that she was a very determined person. When she set her mind to do something nothing could stop her. She was also very good at anything she decided to do. When I was growing up, she tackled lots of projects. She made and painted ceramics (we even had a kiln!) and made macrame hangings. She was an excellent seamstress and made beautifully tailored clothes. She was also a first rate book keeper, that is one lesson that I am sad she was never able to teach me! She loved fiercely and thoroughly. I cannot imagine where I would be today if it were not for her.



I was about eight years old when I first remember meeting her. I was living at Turley Childrens Home and had probably been living there for about a year. I'm sure I met her my first day there, but I don't remember much about that very bad day. So, after a year there I had the opportunity to earn some extra money. She worked as the secretary in the office there. I was allowed to go there 2 or 3 days each week after school and clean and run errands for the office workers for some extra money, I think it was all of a dollar a week or something like that. It felt like a fortune to me!



This was exciting on several levels. First, money. I had NEVER had money of my own. We did get fifty cents a week allowance, but we were only allowed to spend one quarter each week. That money went fast on candy at the snack bar. Second, boredom. We were not allowed to watch much television so we always had to play outside every day. We did not have bikes or toys (not many anyway). So it was not much fun. Third, importance! I felt very special for the first time in my life. Bobby (my future mom) was so nice to me. She taught me how real ladies act, dress, talk and work. Some of that I have forgotten, but most I do remember. This arrangement went on for several years.



A few years later, when I had been at Turley for nearly 5 years, it was decided that I was a good match for foster care. I was excited about that! Shortly after that I was told that Bobby wanted me to come live with her and her husband. I don't know how to describe my feelings when I heard that she wanted me! Euphoria would be mild. Looking back now, I can't begin to imagine what she must have been thinking. I was at a very awkward age. A big, overgrown, clumsy oaf. Only she (and God!) could see any hope for me. I had almost no clothing and what I had did not fit and was not really usable. She never made me feel bad about that. She just taught me how to love myself. That was a hard lesson for me and sometimes I still struggle with that!

Bobby was a dedicated Christian. I had already accepted Christ and been baptized when I went to live with them, but she taught me what that really meant. Along with her husband, my dad, Art, I learned how to put others first and how a Christian takes care of others. She lived her religion every day that I knew her. I have never met anyone like her since.


I thanked her many times over the years, but I don't know if I ever made her understand how much she did for me. That gift has compounded itself many times over the years. I think about her every day. I am sure she is enjoying her reward in heaven very much. If there was ever a woman on earth who deserved that, it was her! Thank you mom. Thank you for the good, Godly advice (I still wish I could get more!), for the wedding dress, for doing my taxes, for loving that dirty, giant oaf of a kid I was, for the Godly example, mostly, just thank you for the love. Good bye.


Bobby Ann Crites Pooler 10/07/1935 to 09/04/2008.